Now this blog tonight can be taken tongue in cheek or for the ones, you know who you are, who have fallen foul of my rules of engagement, you can take it personally if you want.
Today I received a phone call and lets just say, "I could not help the gentleman", but the conversation gave me fodder for a quick blog about some of the things that do my head in when people contact me about our dogs. Warning: Does contain one inferred expletive.
1. Call me first as last. I will need to speak to you. So if contacting me first by email and then I ask you to ring me and you then email me again asking more questions, that can be answered easily by just reading the website, instant blacklisting. Shows that you have not read the website and cannot take simple instruction.
2. Read the website, especially the page, "Buying a puppy from Poundlane" before contacting me, Asking me where I am ? How much for a puppy ? Do you export pups ? etc, seriously this indicates that you have not read the website.
3. If contacting me by email rather than phoning, please try and type more than one sentance. I'm old fashoined, like to be addressed in the email, like Dear or Hello and my name helps and the fact that you then sign off with a regards or thank you is also nice.
4. When emailing using text speak, I'm probably not going to understand what you have typed. Lol and smiley faces I just about tolerate. What is that with you grown men, sending smiley faces ?Lol.
5. When contacting me your wealth and what status you think you hold in the grand scheme of things, really means little to me. I don't need to know how many homes you own and I don't need to know the value of the homes you own.
6. When contacting me by email for the first contact, don't send me an email that also shows me your work or status at work. It may be unintentional, but it looks like you might think being a CEO or working in Westminster might be a plus, believe me it's not.
7. Don't contact me saying, "I'm getting a puppy from another breeder and wondered if you could help us with rearing our puppy. The breeder ticks all the boxes, but we wondered what you feed your pups ?" If the breeder ticks all the boxes, why the f--k are you asking me for help.
Now I often help people who have got their pup home from another breeder and they are encountering problems and for some reason the breeder cannot be contacted, but when you have even not got the pup home and tell me the breeder, "ticks all the boxes" I'm going to tell you what we feed our pups, it's no secret, but I'm also going to question does your breeder really tick all the boxes ?
8. Don't contact me by email giving a specific date you want a pup, it don't work like that and you need to read up on some basic biology.
9. Don't contact me saying you are getting engaged and you want to get a puppy as a surprise for your fiance or it's a surprise birthday present. Not a good idea to surprise someone with a pup, as you might be surprised when they actually can't cope with it and you are taking the pup back to the breeder or even worse the rescue home.
10. and lastly for now. Don't embarrass yourself, by asking me, " How much deposit do you need, for me to move up the waiting list ?"
Good to get things off your chest and those ten rolled off the old grey matter so easily, I may revisit this subject again in the future.
I will blog tomorrow with photos and updates on Primrose's pups and the girls being chosen and named over the weekend. Long weekend and have done eight hours milking today, four hours each end of the day and two visits to view pups, we are a bit tired.
“The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you,but he will make a fool of himself, too.”
― Samuel Butler
Me (Jane) with Bumble and Blottie, waiting patiently to be unleashed, November 2018
Hello, I am Jane!